Based on LOVE POTION NUMBER 9 by the Clovers or the Searchers

I was drinking at the rendezvous,
I met Junita with her single tooth
She showed me how to have a good time.
Was when I first heard of position 69

I told her that I was as flop with chicks
I'd been without since 1986
She looked at my palm knew how I spent my
Said she'd make me an expert at position 69

She pushed me down, then turned around and gave me a wink,
Said, go down there, enjoy yourself, and do what you think,
Was like a hedgehog but with a fishy like stink.
I held my breath, I closed my eyes, I took a drink

Now I practice every day and night, just hope that I am doing it right
But when I got a red rash around my lips bigtime
I had to stop my Position 69
(If searchers version repeat the last verse)

Position 69

(Well its 96 really, I just can't afford to eat out anymore)

Position 69.